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09 October 2016 @ 09:58 pm
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I disabled comments after getting some...interesting? comments. Go ahead and message me or just send me a request and I will check you out :)

I will keep entries public for 10 days, each (Or every two weeks if I am suddenly swamped!). Then they will be locked. This allows people to get a taste of what I'm like while still giving me a sense of privacy.

Thanks for understanding!


"If you keep staying over here, your parents are going to start to wonder where the heck you are disappearing to," I laugh after taking a sip of my Macaroon Tea then rolling over to face him. Lacing his fingers through my hair, he tilted his head to the side and laughed, "They don't really meddle in my life. Besides, they know where I am. I told them I have a girlfriend now."

"Oh..." I answer, nodding, and I must have sounded disappointed because he immediately asks me if we were supposed to keep it on the low. I tell him I was just a bit surprised, but that it was perfectly okay, and he responds by laying down and pulling me down next to him, "I don't plan on hiding you."

Ryu and I spent the weekend together, hitting a Zoo/Amusement park on Saturday before coming home to watch a movie, then lazying about on Sunday until 9:00pm, after going to the shopping center to buy a few things. Ryu now has a toothbrush and a set of pajamas that will remain permanently at my place for his sudden visits. Kenshi and I didn't reach that step until we had dated for a year already, so I'm a bit taken back by how quickly it happened, but I'm not entirely bothered.

I am, however, nervous. They say that when something seems too good to be true....it usually is. And in such a short time, Ryu and I are making leaps and bounds, reaching steps I had to metaphorically twist Kenshi's arm to achieve.

Once I told my hairdresser that Kenshi and I had broken up, and told him a bit about Ryu, he confessed that he had never really disliked Kenshi, but that he hadn't thought Kenshi was a good match for me. Meanwhile, the owner of the cafe bar I always frequent, who I haven't yet told that Kenshi and I have separated, seemed extremely confused to see me walk in with Ryu, and was on eggshells around us the entire time.

I laughed about it and told Ryu, to which Ryu poked me in the side and said, "Then tell him. He's going to have to get used to seeing me around."

And there he went again, leaping over Kenshi. Kenshi wasn't bad -- he was a great guy and he loved me in his own way. However, that way of his always had me at number four on his list of priorities. Aside from his best friend, he never introduced me to people, and while he would tell people he had a girlfriend, he would never specifically say it was me. He would often remind me that we were just temporary, that he would leave to pursue his dreams of working and studying abroad.  And here is Ryu, who within the first week of dating, has already made it clear to his loved ones that I exist and what I look like, and has made many assurances that he was planning on something long term.

But again, when something seems too good to be true....

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15 February 2017 @ 09:51 am
Exhausted. Ryu came over to celebrate Valentines day. We hadn't made plans to meet up, but when I finished work and got on the train, he messaged me saying he wanted to meet up and could be at my place by 9:30. So he came and we hung out, talking about this and that while listening to music. Surprisingly, we actually slept. Or, he did, and I tried to, anyway. For some reason, I kept having horrible dreams and waking up.It was murder dragging myself out of bed at 5am to get ready for work. We left the house together at 6:30, I walked him to his car, we said our goodbyes and then I dragged myself through the 30 minute walk to my station to get to work.
We're going for a drive on Saturday and visiting a zoo/amusement park.

I met up with K a few days ago in Shinjuku, and for the first time, we met in the afternoon as opposed to the morning. Things were really crowded and we had a few things happen to us that really irritated us, but overall, it was an okay day.
13 February 2017 @ 01:52 pm
"I want you to date me," he said, leaning over slightly so that his shoulder pressed against mine. Laughing outloud, I dropped my head on to the table, "That has absolutely nothing to do with 突然ですが、明日結婚します."

He was momentarily silent before finally taking a deep breath and adjusting his position so that he was sitting directly in front of me, legs crossed.  " I'm serious. I knew it last week. Remember when you were really busy, but didn't tell me you would be?"

I nodded.

"You didn't answer my messages for two days. And it hurt. I got scared. I felt like I wanted to get in my car and just drive over and make sure you were okay," He confessed, to which I shifted slightly, diverting my gaze to the remaining pasta and chicken on our plates, trying to guess what he would say next. "And I knew it then--" he continued, "--that I want to be with you. Because not being near you, not being in contact with you, hurts. That's something, right? That the reason I want to be with you is not just because I have fun when we are together, but because I don't want to be apart? " He paused. "So. Date me. Sometimes, I don't get what you're trying to say or what you are thinking. But I want to listen anyway. Give me that chance to know you and understand you."

I looked everywhere but at him. My mind and heart were running in two different lines. There were things I wanted to say but didn't want to hear a reply to. "Okay," I answered simply, nodding my head once. "Okay. Okay. Yes. Okay. Alright." He tilted his head slightly and laughed a bit, "You don't seem too sure. It sounds more like you're assuring yourself it's okay, than you are eagerly accepting my offer."

Once again, I slammed my head on the table, groaning in to a notebook that we had been scribbling on. "Actually, I had written a reply to you at that time, when I was really busy. And then I fell asleep, forgetting to send it, and didn't realize that I didn't." He said nothing, But as soon as I raised my head, he leaned forward, cupping my face in his hands, and kissed me.

And I let him. Because while I have dated many guys before, this was the first time someone had told me that just the idea of my not existing in their day, hurt. I walked him to his car parked ten minutes way. He drove me back to my flat. He walked me back to my door and held my hands. Then he laughed. "You're aware this is not a dream, right?"

"I was wondering if I would remember when I woke up," I laughed. He kissed me again. "I don't want to go. But it's midnight. You wake up at 5am, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I need to get some sleep."
But I couldn't get to sleep until 3am. Yet somehow, I seem to be making it through this 10 hour shift just fine.
When I get home, I might just take the last of Kenshi's pictures down.
05 January 2017 @ 06:46 am
Just in case it went missed (Since people seem to be freaking out now more than ever), you can reach my DW by clicking on the image to the left. Livejournal will still be my platform until it completely disappears from the net, but for those who decide to stop using LJ beforehand, the content on my DW will be exactly the same. I look forward to keeping touch with everyone here, there, or even on both.

So why am I an idiot? Because I accidentally made this entry private so that only I could see it, then paniced when no one had come forward to either add me or give me their DW account. I was sad that no one wanted to keep in touch. Why didn't anyone keep in touch??

Because you couldn't see this entry XD My bad.